A few years back I facilitated a series of constellations over a month or two. They felt really good in the moment, my clients were happy, the group seemed happy, everyone left smiling. I patted myself on the back – a job well done.
Until the phone calls came in
“Jack, I’ve been feeling really strange ever since the event” or “Jack there’s something disturbing that happened at the workshop” or “Jack, I wasn’t happy with the event.”
In all of these situations, I thought I led a strong, supportive event and yet some clients and participants weren’t happy or were negatively impacted – What was going on???
The lesson I Needed To Learn
Had this happened just once or twice I might have ignored it as a fluke – but 5 events in a row, I was paying attention!!
In addition to clients who were hurting, I was taking this pretty hard myself. I tend to take on a lot of responsibility anyway (which is an issue I won’t go into now). This series of events was having deep, personal impact.
I knew the way these events were unfolding, Spirit was trying to tell me something. I just didn’t know what.
Finally, out of sheer personal agony and frustration
I got it!
And I staked my claim:
“I must make these events safer”
From this time on I’ve never had a series of events with people negatively impacted, it’s happened occasionally, but nothing like this stretch.
I realized I had to make the events safer. I was a fairly new facilitator with about 3 years under my belt. The solution that finally came to me and worked miracles, was to ask for more Spiritual support and help. Now this may seem like common sense, I already did some of this, but I was being asked to do more.
I began arriving at each event at least 45 minutes early. I would invite the Divine (and much more) to come into the space. I invoked the directions one by one, called in the Divine, asked for the support of my Guides and Helpers and the Angelic forces. I prayed for the strength of my ancestors. All in all I now spend a good amount of time dedicated here.
To me, the room is now fully prepared, but I still do one more thing…
After the participants arrive and I complete sharing about the work: Dr. Hellinger, the history, the Field and the potential results, I ask participants to join me in helping set the Field. We close our eyes, tune inward, and one by one go around the circle and invoke whatever Spiritual forces we want present.
To honor those who do NOT have Spiritual world views or beliefs I always share, “please pass when your turn comes.” I also share a story about how most of my parents and relatives are atheists and that I fully respect this view.
This circle of invocation adds a palpable difference the space. We can feel it!
I’m happy to say that since I began personally setting the space before participants arrive and inviting participants to invoke their own healers and protectors, I’ve rarely had a problem like that series of events many years ago.
Sharing What I’ve Learned With Others
Constellations are my main working tool and I’m moving towards Constellations being my full time offering. My events are almost full enough to do this and I’m feeling motivated to share what I’ve learned with healers and therapists.