Feeling Shame: Healing Shame
Shame is a bit like mold; mold loves wet, damp and musty places where it can grow and spread. To stop the spread of mold it must be brought into the open.
Mold doesn’t like sunlight; it’s too open, airy and fresh. If exposed to sunlight, it will retreat and find somewhere else to live.
Shame is like this. Shame festers in the dark and damp, when brought into the sun, with fresh air and daylight, shame retreats and finds a better place to live.
To heal shame, you must let it breathe, let it into the open. You must feel it, not keeping it locked away and unattended in the dark and musty closet of your mind. You must befriend your shame. Introduce it to people, tell them, “This is my shame, it arrived long ago when I was young and now I’m sharing it with the world. It’s a part of me and it’s okay.”
When you stop hiding your shame, when you befriend it and share it with people, it loses its power. It’s no longer the monster hidden behind the cellar door.
Eventually shame may even become a gift, teaching you about compassion and forgiveness.
Let it out today, share a bit of your shame with someone safe. Maybe they’ll even share a bit of theirs with you. Then both of you can be free.
Shame, like mold, atrophies in sunlight, set yourself free.
Blessings, Jack Blackwell